Granted, but it has no strings.

I wish my boyfriend would wake up.

Granted, but he's a Maverick in disguise.

I wish I could marry Zero from Megaman X?

Granted, but you get a divorce immediately.

I wish my coffee wasn't too hot to drink.

Granted, but then it becomes stone cold. Frozen coffee! Yum..

I wish..something interesting was on TV

Granted, but you get sucked into it. Not literally, of course. But you can't look away and you waste away your morning/afternoon/evening in front of it.

I wish I had a new dress.

Granted but it wouldn't fit you.

I wish I were taller.

Granted, but then you'd have osteoporosis. (I'm evil =D)

I wish I could dominate the universe and all of it's life forms.

Granted, but you are assassinated.

I wish I could find denim capris that don't make me look like a boy.

Granted, but they're shorts

I wish I would create the race of rapid hamsters?

Granted, but they create an uprising against you, and turn you into hamster kibble.

I wish it was raining.

Granted, but then it becomes a storm and your computer--and it's hard drive--is electrocuted.

I wish I could make out with Johnny Depp and give him babies =D

Granted but you'll have bearded girls

I wish my hamster would talk

Granted but then you find out your hamster hates your guts.

I wish I could lose just a bit of weight.

Granted, but then you'd gain it all back and some after a day.

I wish stars could really grant wishes.

Granted, but they twist them, much like we do here.

I wish it was winter.

Granted, but you'll never feel warm ever again.

I wish I had a kitty

Granted then it gets pregnant and dumps kittens on you.

I wish I have sushi.

Granted, but you will get food poisoning from it.

I wish I had the motivation to do some chores.

Granted, but you will be stuck doing them forever.

I wish I was able to boss people around

Granted, but people start to really hate you after you boss them around too much.

I wish I knew what to do tonight. Party or dinner?

Granted, and I'll tell you, but your just going to forget it in three seconds.

I wish I had cookies

Granted, but they will be burnt.

I wish I could get a puppy.

Granted, but then it'll be a biting pooping poodle.

I wish my wish could be twist free.

Granted...
O.O

I wish I had a new game to play on the PS3.

Granted, but the game is incredibly boring.

I wish that my earphones didn't sound so odd because they're stereo.