The eternal struggle of the postal couriers being jerky by not offering any help when you receive a heavy package. Then again, they are none too happy when I order heavy loads.

This didn't ruin my day, but I am bummed out about it.

The person I spent the past couple of years ordering houseplants from online has shut down her business. That happened in October which I wasn't happy about, but she still had her You Tube channel and her site up so if I wanted to know something or had a plant problem, I could continue to use either one as a trusted resource. She has now shut down her YT channel and her website is just a single page thanking customers for their business over the years. All that is left is her Facebook page and all that is there are shorts or clips.

I understand why she's shutting everything down, but it still sucks. Now I have to try to find a new trust-worthy source. Between the crap that is all over the internet in general, then tossing in AI written bullshit that doesn't make sense to begin with... Meh.

Jinxed myself, probably.
Yesterday when I was hanging out with my mum I was like look my hands have deflated and overall better than last year and the year before! Woke up this morning to achey fingers and then they were basically sausages by the afternoon. Betrayed by my self once again.

My throat has been hurting for a few days now, but I mostly feel fine otherwise.

Other than a baby with a slight hint of sniffles (the day before my throat started hurting), I have absolutely no idea who I've come into contact with the last couple weeks who were sick, since I've only been outside maybe one time and mostly around one other person who's perfectly fine...

Sore all over again.

That fall was unkind.

I should be careful to not let that happen again.

This TEMU HAUL is OUT OF THIS WORLD!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AuuniyvVc0Q

Girl, nah. I'm not a therapist nor do I pretend to be one, but there is some serious shit going on here.

Don't tell me about how your channel isn't about compulsive hoarding and that you're only doing these things to show what items Temu has as some kind of service that nobody asked for while leaving a code in your info box because you're a Temu influencer who wants all that Temu 'seed' money as Temu calls it.

If people wanted to see what was on Temu, they could go visit the obnoxious website themselves. Temu is set up exactly like mobile games with flashing lights, mini games and all the things that keep people around so they'll spend money they don't have because they think they're getting a deal. Spend money and Temu will give you 'free' fish food for the digital fish that will die if you don't continue to spend more money.

Then there is the issue of chasing the YT algorithm which is leading to more hoarding. Nobody needs over 100 boxes of fake nails, mountains of diamond paintings that will never be finished, the countless handbags that you buy then complain about and the list goes on and on. There are plenty of other examples of people chasing the YouTube algorithm. We didn't have these issues when people made videos because they wanted to and it was a hobby versus today where it is all about chasing dollars.

When your mother tells you that you have a shopping problem and you have to sneak packages into the house while she's asleep, there are issues.



https://www.verywellhealth.com/hoarding-5093362

Not necessarily having to say anything about the contents of the video, but I do have some unsolicited advice, Gargoyle.

I have some return unsolicited advice.

For years I've been told that I must be angry if I'm critical of something ( or anything) around here. Unless you're sitting on my shoulder and somehow experience the blood boiling and so-called rage that you are accusing me off, I consider that a projection.

EDIT: I at least I didn't give the answer I always get which for some weird reason always involves drinking bottles of wine. I don't drink, it is strange advice.

I'm not objecting to this! I definitely do have a tendency to perceive criticism online (of myself or others) as attacks, and I have a difficult time having a heated, but civil, argument IRL. I won't be the type of person that explodes, but my voice will be shaking and my heart rate peaking as I prefer to deal with things in a light-hearted way only (thru flowers and smiles and rainbows) – definitely something I've got to work on.

The distinction between anger and criticism to me is quite some food for thought I suppose.

Got sent home from work (or rather got sent to hospital from work... and they billed me for using the work van!) because I fell over last week and landed on my shoulder. It's been getting increasingly painful as the days go on though so an x-ray was kinda necessary. I'm going on a work trip from tomorrow for a whole week so I was really worried I'd have to cancel. But it's fine, no broken bones - just a little muscle damage. I was sent home with a leaflet about shoulder exercises. I was tempted to go back to work and finish my shift, but I've also got a horrific sinus infection that I should probably nurse before we set off tomorrow morning. My nose is dripping like a tap, my eyes are swollen and I have an ear infection on one side. Of course I get ill now of all times!

My cat Gemini has been puking all morning and I'm afraid she's dying after all we could do to prolong the inevitable end of our little friend. She's still been peeing in the litter box, but not as much.

If she stops peeing, she is facing kidney shutdown and for me and my dad, this may be the last goodbye we give to the cat. We knew that she would eventually decline.

I'll keep you posted. My dad will be heartbroken. He earned her trust and vice versa.

Can't stop coughing and wheezing. I feel bad because I'm at a hotel and the walls are really thin. I'm pretty sure everyone in the neighbouring rooms (and further) can hear me hacking up my lungs all night long.

I hope you feel better really soon, @Bigsimsfan12 ! *Hugs*

Work. Started short-staffed, so got set up on something I definitely did not want and definitely hadn't signed up for (I'd swapped a shift), then was shifted over on something else (which I was fine with, but it's still a tough shift), and from there things just went downhill. In addition to all the regular work, I got a bunch of extra things to do (because short-staffed and other person needed some help, and I was the only other qualified). Some "pokes" went bad-ish (ended up with blood all over me from one of them - equipment issues combined with elderly blood vessels...), and there were grumpy people all over the line (a few will give you an earful if you as much as look at them wrong, and today was that day...).

Then dragged home 3 bags of groceries that I barely managed to lift, so my arms are probably going to be sore tomorrow.

Currently (for the sake of curiosity, I guess?) watching a video about some sleep products (lights, etc.) and falling asleep several times. Yeah, I currently have no problems falling asleep (slept 4-5 hours after dinner, all wrung out after work, and been nodding off several times after that) :/

The air is extremely dry in my house for nearly a week and I constantly get zapped by whatever I touch due to static electricity.

Update: Air dry again and still getting shocked.

My cat Gemini just fell down half the stairs and is currently trying to get her bearings after falling down. I have cat-sitting duty today as my cat likely had a seizure. (Our last cat to have one had balance impairment from one.)

Update 1: Cat is not eating, just puking but not hiding. this is a miserable Friday.

Poor Gemini! I hope she is okay.

Gemini spent most of today asleep after her incident this morning. I had also to take into account my grandfather having to go to the hospital for care for fluid in his lungs, politics of all sorts, finances, the possibility of losing two family members and the house I live in.

This is all the things that bring anxiety in adulting.

I am extremely stressed. I need to eat. I hope mom is coming in soon with dinner. It's been a rough Friday.

I just need a meal and rest.

Update: my grandfather was released from the hospital after the treatment.

Update on Gemini: She's doing well, but we're no longer allowing her near the basement.

Otherwise, we're going to keep an eye on her. She's 14. That's ancient for an indoor\outdoor cat.

Sometimes I randomly get red patches on my face and neck that are hot and tingly and sometimes very itchy. Didn't need to ask mum if they were doing their thing today cos they really wanted to be felt My face was fine after like 10 minutes but when I unzipped my coat in a shop (so stuffy) I saw my reflection and there was a massive red patch right in the middle of my throat. No wonder I got several odd looks! It looked like I got punched in the throat! (Which like, no thanks?).

Full moon tendencies at work... 🐺
(but then again, I've seen worse when it wasn't full moon)

I am starting to hate being an adult.

Particularly, I am just worn out from the news, politics, finances and just everything that makes me feel like I am going to burn out like a match.

Sometimes, I just want to be happy. But right now...I have a responsibility to be informed and secure.

It's no longer like me to do anything rash and against my better judgement.

Right now I'm tired, it's Sunday afternoon. I would very much like to do something today that doesn't require eating something I didn't want because I am trying to stick to a diet.

(In all honesty, I had take out 3 days in a row for dinner.)

2/26/2024
Yeah, I am realizing that I need to be more responsible for my actions as the only person in my family who even does anything related to the government.

In fact, a government agency asked if I needed assistance obtaining a COVID-19 vaccine on the phone yesterday afternoon on Sunday. I told him, the man on the other end, I already got it last week.

My father didn't believe it was the real deal, but it was the helpline as it was registered in my phone and I Googled them and they're the actual group.

A helpline like ours is always open, 24/7/365. New Jersey is actually a great place to get treatment. We have hospitals and pharmaceutical companies that develop various medications and medicines.

Sometimes, my cycle will lead to hormonal surges that result in bright red cheeks on my face and they're really warm to the touch. You're not alone on such issues of skin conditions of hot, warm patchy skin as a symptom.

My throat hurts for the second time this month (probably from work, seems like everyone's got a bug these days).

Had some blood work done several days ago, and got a giant bruise that still hurts. This one is the full length of my little finger and still full-on purple! Feels like every time other lab techs than the one at home poke me, they nearly always hit a nerve and leave me with bruises, even when they hit on first try.

Also, work. Elderly people with various health issues have good days and bad days, but sometimes it seems they all come together and have bad days on the same day, which get increasingly frustrating when several of them insist on taking their irritation and/or bad mood out on everyone around them. I'm not sure how many times I had to take a deep breath throughout the day, but it was plenty enough... Couldn't even leave work without a final situation involving confused person in chair, stairs, and fortuntely a locked gate to said stairs (solved itself, thankfully). Some days...

Ended up sleeping away most of the evening (as per usual after work). I was completely toast...

I WAS happy to find my bottled water had came early.

But when I saw they left it in the driveway again, there was a part of me screaming on the inside "Aw, for fuck's sakes, Abraham!" I was not happy with the fact that they did that.

I think I just pissed off the delivery driver.

If it's anything like the delivery drivers in my country, then they are likely paid pittance and expected to deliver a large number of packages in a very short time. So if they carry the parcel down a long driveway on each house they visit, they likely wouldn't be able to deliver the items they need to in the time they have. A courier I was recently talking to explained to me how he had several hundred packages in his van, and that he had to do that many each day because he was only paid a few pence per item. Doesn't work out as much per hour when you take into account walking to and from the van, and driving around the streets. Plus they are self employed, so pay their own tax and costs and pension. No sick or holiday pay.

I ended up lifting over 100 pounds today total and nearly threw out my back in the process.

Also, I am at a loss trying to figure out why my computer wasn't connected to my phone for audio\video transfer and then it connects. I got grumpy and was like "I am beginning to hate you, Bessie 3..."

I live in the United States and union\regulatory body rules may vary.

I broke my bed last night, just by sitting down on it. I had my doubts about the thing when I first saw it, in spite of my brother's assurances, when he helped me assemble it, that he had one just like it and never had any problems. The mattress is supported by wooden slats, rather like they had in P.O.W. camps, although I bet those were of a more robust construction. They'd have to be. with a lot of strapping great soldiers, sailors and airmen sleeping on them. And I, as I may have mentioned before, am a person of, shall we say, rather more modest stature. So if my bed breaks under my weight, how's it supposed to stand up under a full grown adult?

I couldn't even inspect the damage this morning, let alone fix it, since I had a doctor's appointment. "You've got to take care of your health", people keep telling me. Well, getting soaked to the skin, waiting for a bus while it pissed down with rain didn't help matters very much!

When I finally got back. I was able to attempt repairs. I discovered that one of the mid-most slats had snapped and the wooden support had come away from the main frame. The thing had actually been nailed into place, surely screws would have been better!. I had to drill out the nail holes so that I could put some self tapping screws through them, so it should be stronger than before. I Think i made a pretty good job it, except I didn't have any wood to replace the broken slat, so I had to borrow one from the end of the bed. Now I must hope the damned thing stays together, at least until I ca-n afford a new bed!

I'm getting fed up with my parents doing my chores while I am home. I am trying to prove I can care for this house.

Arggh! What a miserable time to be alive! Can't sit and rest for 15 minutes? For fuck's sakes, Abraham...I can't seem to catch a break!

Abraham? Just some teacher I worked with after graduation. He was irritating.

Heard about the telecommunications outages.

As the granddaughter and daughter of 2 respected telecommunications experts...I had that gut feeling like "Something ain't right".

So much nagging at work (at times I'm convinced certain people treat us like personal servants they can boss around - some people think yanking the call bells means they get first-dibs, within ten seconds rights to whatever they want, and get pissed off if they have to wait a few minutes, but never consider we can't be 10 places at once and that other people might need us too, especially those who can't/don't use the call bell...)

Then stressed from shop to shop and dragged 2 heavy grocery bags home.

And after dinner proceeded to fall asleep and be completely knocked out for 5-6 hours.

Plus it's spider and isopod season again. Those little bastards are everywhere (and for some reason love my room )...

Work. Again. Or information from work, that is. They can't pull their things together and put out decent information.
- Put the info in the proper channel - it needs to be a separate info blob, and where it belongs. If I stumble across it when I least expect it, and if the info is mixed in with some other random info and not a proper note in itself, I don't know how seriously I'm going to take it, either.
- Put it out in good time. Preferably at least 5 days to a week before (not in random place, and a day before the weekend when the meeting is a tuesday, especially when you're herding cats who mostly rely on the Jungle telegraph and maybe read the info a couple days a week at best - if they even know where/how to read it, because they barely gave us instructions for how to use the programs, just assumed some of us would figure it out and teach the rest, so a couple or so years later there are still people who barely know how to use the sites, like I witnessed only yesterday... ).
- Time, date, place and other info ("This Tuesday" or "Next Friday" is not spesific enough. Date, please! I don't care if you say it is tomorrow, I need you to put a date on it, because if I see it in 3 days I need to know if I've missed it or have to put it on the calendar!)
- Do I have to meet in-person, can I take it over the web, or do I have to be on the meeting at all? (If the info isn't super obvious, I'm going to assume the answer is "no". Also, I really do need to know if it's web-friendly if it's held in a room where web meetings are commonly held. If you don't say anything I am going to assume it could be web-friendly, especially if it's my day off. I'm not showing up if I don't have to, but I'm good with web meetings since those don't take much prep time. I've had too many cancelled meetings on my days off, and I'm sick of spending 2-3 hours on showing up for *nothing*, because nobody says anything if something gets cancelled, of course ).

I mean, come on? How hard can it be?



Normally they are able to it, so why is it so difficult the times when they don't?

The "curse of calm".

Never mention to a health worker who's coming on shift that "the last shift was calm/quiet/peaceful" or any other synonym. It's a curse upon the next shift. You can say it was an okay shift or something similar, but never use the word "calm".

Everything went somewhat fine the first part of the shift. Then the "curse of calm" hit with the force of a nuclear bomb on the last part of the shift 🥴

I mean, I've had worse days at work, but still... Just happy to walk out of there and let someone else deal with it for a few days...

(Got cake when I got home, from a birthday party I couldn't attend - a treat which was sorely needed. I'd rather have been at the birthday party...)

I just got a TikTok the other day explaining this exact phenomenon!

Could be any, although this one is a fave, along with this one - but yeah, this.

Goes for most healthcare staff and emergency personnel.

It was neither of those - it was just a first-person perspective of an ER worker that radio'd "what a quiet night tonight" - and not a second later, a very agitated person starts shouting from the other end. The comments explained what's going on currently, my FYP just loves not explaining anything and making me search for an answer myself. Most of the time I can't be bothered though, but this one stuck with me.

Kind of annoyed cos we went out of our way to get 2 nice cakes for a bunch of people that were coming over (we love options). Anyway one of them saw us take the cakes out of the fridge and in a super annoying tone was like "did you know all cakes from that place are stuffed full with gelatin - we dont eat that because its so bad for you!" Understandably mum and dad got a bit upset since like they def asked several times over the last few weeks whether any of them had any dietry requirements and they'd all said no. Also these people didnt even bring flowers or chocolate or anything, like guys come on that's first time dinner guest rule 101.

I guess I'm taking cake with me to work tomorrow

I've seen a few different, like this one.



Unless they're going all vegan or some such, it's not worse than eating meat. Regular non-vegan gelatin is just protein derived from collagen from animals. Can't speak for the cakes, though (but cakes generally aren't health foods anyway :/ ).

Some people are never happy. Maybe next time they should offer to bring the cakes, since they "clearly" know which ones are the best ones, or maybe are willing to bake. There are lots of good reasons why people would buy cakes instead of baking them, or have a favorite place to buy them from, and as a guest there are very few valid reasons for complaining, especially if they've already been asked for dietary restrictions and all that . Valid options are to eat the cakes they're offered and not say anything, or to not eat the cakes and not say anything (nobody is forcing them to eat, and opinions about the bakery can be kept to themselves).

@simmer22 Shame cakes aren't health foods because life would be fantastic if they were
But yeah, what we did was perfectly normal so they're clearly the sort that unreasonable. The parentals have decided that they'll never voluntarily invite them anywhere ever again


I orded new glasses like 3 weeks ago. Last week they were like they haven't been made yet but we'll update you soon! And then the email I got like an hour ago was like yeah production operations told us that they've not got the frame in stock (which is wild because I speficially went and ordered my glasses because they were back in stock) and that I have a few options: wait for the unknown, see if they have it in another colour/ change frame, or get my money back. I'm annoyed because I picked this optician instead of my ususal because these people were supposed to do better (and faster) but so far.....

Couldn't agree more

The glasses issue sounds weird, although I'm assuming it works different where you live than here. I've just picked out frames, they order the glass, and I've always assumed they've put the frames I picked to the side with my name on it until the glass arrive (they cut to shape in-store).

Heartbroken, again. I'm so tired of it, I've wanted to be married and settled since I was a teenager. I'm worn out and tired of other people assuming that being single is my choice, when actually I don't like it and want someone to love.

I could understand if I was seeing men I didn't click with, and didn't have the right feelings for. But to fall in love, he loves me back and be happy, then things go wrong, is so painful. As I've gotten older I've had to learn about setting boundaries etc, and not accepting certain behaviours. But sticking to that is so hard, and I'm so sad now.

In the middle of making dinner, pan was probably a bit too toasty, I put some butter in and then the meat (which was probably a bit too liquidy from some sauce) which hit the heat/fat in the pan a bit too fast, and it splashed up on my arm. So now I've got three long thin (but not too serious) blisters that hurt (I held my arm under runny water for a while, so probably calmed down the worst of it, but still)...

Also quite toast from work, so slept away most of the evening (as per usual after work).

Just have been trying to not let my mother get to me over any debts I owe her and the fact I need food, along with water and equipment to work with.

In short, I am still doing chores like my life depends on it.

I've been in Waiting Mode TM all day and I don't know why

Work was a constant stream of stuff that kept happening, and nagging all day (halfway through the day I just wanted to throw the phone out the window, because it felt like it kept ringing every 5-10 minutes...), and I left the building feeling I had absolutely no control over what I'd gotten done - especially since everyone kept delegating their work to me while I had a ton of other things to do on top of that. I hate those days...

Lots of Easter candy leftovers at work, so was powered by sugar all day. Not sure if that was a good thing (probably not - but somehow I'm still awake. Usually I've been sleeping half the evening by now...)

Someone's stolen our recycling bin from the garden great, now our house will be full of rubbish until the council bother getting us a new one.

Oh no! Usually you can ask online for a new one. Mine keep getting run over, I think the bin men leave them on the path but the wind blows them around!

Thank you! I filled in the form... and then when my husband got home he proudly told me he'd also filled in the same form. Who knows maybe we'll get 2 new bins

This is exactly like listening to my parents when they were talking about how strangely empty the supermarkets were while they were buying food for Easter... separately... without consulting each other.

What's great is that now we have double the cooked ham and double all the other traditional meals we serve for Easter, but one less guy because my dad decided to go hang out with his car enthusiast buddies on Easter Sunday and Easter Monday away from town.

I'm not in for the Easter being a family holiday blah blah – no, I'm just kinda pissed off because we had twice as much food and roughly half as many mouths to feed, because dad can eat for three if he gives his best... It's now Wednesday evening and there's still some food left.

First world problems, truly.

Either the council are REALLY QUICK or our recycling bin has rematerialised (this didn't ruin my day, just seemed easier to update in this thread)

You may end up with three now!

Oh my God! The biggest earthquake I ever felt hit my house at 10:30AM. It was in a town 8.5 miles east of us that was hit hard with a shallow 4.8 quake (shallow ones do more destruction.) Woke me out of a sound sleep. Our entire family in my father's family felt it!

Last quake I felt was a deep 7.3 quake in February 2001 when I was a teenager in Redmond, WA.

As for now, I have to stay vigilant for aftershocks in the following hours. My father will be inspecting the house when he's through with the inspection of the warehouse.

For now, sleep is not an option for me. I just need to keep calm.

Update: at 6:00PM ET we encountered an aftershock that affected our locale in New Jersey. My youngest uncle and his wife reported they were affected, but no one else. At least I was prepared for earthquake readiness during my days in Washington State and the Pacific Rim's Ring of Fire.

Wind was so strong, my glasses FLEW OFF MY FACE and into a road. And then just as I almost grabbed them, another gush of wind knocked me off my feet and my glasses almost down a drain. Thankfully I grabbed them. Then the bus was 2 hours late. Yay.

Also my day at work was crap. Theres a woman there who hates me, and we had a massive thing last week where she brought up a traumatic life event for me for no reason (literally I was just minding my own business not even talking to her)...and then acted like I was the asshole for pointing out her involvement in it and how that affected my family. Anyway, today 2 people told me that she had been gossiping about me and that I'm causing HER stress. Also she blanked me completely the whole 12 hour shift... which kinda works for me so meh.

As part of my mission to switch job (cos this one just aint it) I signed up with a recruitment agency (or several). The problem is I know which agency it isn't but not which it is cos the job title is generic mcgeneric but the roles vary. So when mysterious agent first left me a voicemail I had no idea what for, it was so unintelligible it took 4 listen throughs to understand what position it was for. Yeah I applied for a role with that name but my dude you need to be a lot more specific.

This agent also can't ever call me at a normal time and they don't seem to have the ability to pick up when I immediately call them back. bro I got a job and I'm not glued to my phone cos I'm at the office cos I'm working- even if I am trying to jump ship. Anyway the real problem is that they called at 16:28 on a Friday. No one with a generic office job is functioning at that time yo, like we all mentally checked out at 2 cos its sunny outside and we're like frogs who need some sunlight do frogs also need to catch them sun rays like we do for health?

(I finally noticed the help/guide button)

Stress, and too much too do+too little time at work...

Who'd have thought that after getting hold of that agent that I would have an interview? Not me because that agent was slippery af and recruiters are basically sales people and no one likes them if you're sales or recruitment sorrynotsorry. The interviewers were really great to talk to but they snuck in a few responsibilities that definitely had no busienss being there- they didn't match the skill set/ experience required and weren't "nice to haves".
So I didn't die or anything which was nice but when I left I knew that wasn't the place for me so I was like bet I get my rejection in 48 hours! Instead the agent's telephone game started again Lady, just email me the "no", yeah?

Mood swings. I just want my period to come soon. It's been driving my family and I crazy.

Being a woman isn't all it's cracked up to be.

My day has not been ruined, but this definitely fits with the "Blargh!" part of the thread title. I have been keeping this in for years now, and I MUST give it voice:

Dear talented mod creator. Your mods are very neat. I think I would like to use them. But I can't get through your descriptions because all of the pictures on your mod pages, including your own avatar, look creepier than Chucky could ever dream of being. Your mod pages are home to a colorful hellscape of soulless eyes and fake smiles. Ditch the pics or just embrace the barely suppressed demonic vibe before it consumes you entirely.

Buying and setting up a new phone for mom, after hers went bye-bye for good after a while of knowing the battery was on its last leg (I told her she should've gotten a new one much sooner - she's already frustrated she couldn't save a lot of what was on it, though she had fortunately done some steps to save stuff about a month or so ago, so not everything was lost). That woman has zero patience and a frustration level through the roof when there's a few more steps than expected...

Brainpower is at an absolute zero after the whole ordeal 🥴 (The setup probably took most of 4+ hours - Half the time used was a big 'ol memory game of what login info goes where, resetting passwords and whatnots )

And on top of that? Stomach bug that decided to kick in middle-of-night-ish 🤢🤮

This wasn't today but I completely forgot about it until I saw this post

So after we got our shiny new recycling bin, our old one reappeared too... Or more specifically a neighbour was in our garden with our old one, seemingly trying to quietly swap it with our new one. I can see the front garden from the livingroom window and just saw a random woman in my garden so I went outside and asked if she was OK. Conversation went like this:

Me: Hi, you ok there?
Her: oh you're in! I was returning your bin. It ended up in my garden by mistake.
Me: Oh okay. Well thank you!
Her: I don't know where mines gone though...
Me: oh, well I filled out an online form and got a bin the next day if you just Google it
Her: well you've got 2 bins and it's bin day tomorrow
Me: yeah... I guess you can have my old one? I have a new one now anyway
Her: but this one has your number on it.

I see her looking at my new bin. And if not for the fact I know she lives 12 houses down from me and my bin was stolen on a non-bin day from my garden, I would've just let her have the new one... but I thought "no. This is my new bin! And she definitely stole it". So I just repeated "well, you can just call the council up or fill in the online form, they're so quick" and just kinda shut the door and she left. I kept the old bin in the garden and hid the new bin in the back garden.

Then I was at work a few days ago and it turns out my bin-thief neighbour is one of my residents family members lmao oops. She came to visit and I avoided her all day as if I wasn't a petty bin-owner.


Also I cut the hedges in the garden and neatened it up a little, because I think maybe she stole my bin because our house was kinda neglected by the last owner and from the outside maybe still looks like noone lives there lol.

I lost my wallet at Europark today. My flight back to home country is tomorrow night, at 10. Luckily, I had like 12 cents in there and two debit cards that I canceled straight away. Apart from my student ID and my public transport pass that I'll need to replace, my biggest headache is the fact that I'm out of my ID that I need in order to board the plane back. And to reach the embassy, I'll need some money to buy a train ticket to the nearest town with my country's embassy. And to get the money, I gotta transfer it from one card to the other because card 1 doesn't support Google Pay and —argh!

Luckily, my boyfriend kindly offered me to use his credit card for all the fares that I'll have to pay on my way to the embassy and back, and I think it will be easiest if I just transferred him the money once I landed back home.

For some reason, losing a wallet, despite having to jump through hoops just for this one ID, is still less a headache than losing my mobile phone I believe.

ID is replaceable and I have time. My phone on the other hand? My phone's got a picture of both sides of my ID, my phone's got all my card numbers in a password manager, my phone's got my Google account (which has all my life and memories and brain) – and I'm not sure if I could log into Google without my phone at this point.

Europark was amazing and all I ever hoped for; until I reached my last ride, was waiting in line and started checking my pockets. I felt like my energy levels just drop to the reddest because of all this government work I'll need to be doing...

This morning mum was like surprise we're visiting our friends that live on the other side of the country tomorrow to see their daughter's (my age) new baby and you're coming with us! Of those family friends, I only like the mum I'm sure the baby is great and all but like I don't want to go? I want to enjoy my weekend because my week is going to be super busy. Plus the baby is like a minute old, there's plenty of time to go see them. Also it seems like its an event hall or soemhting and that means socialising and I'm so not in the mood lol am I ever?

I got back home using a temporary travel certificate. The next day after returning home, I got an email that they have found my wallet at the park and offered to send it to me. While identity theft sucks and I had to cancel my national ID, at least I won't have to cancel my student ID and my public transport pass.

Meanwhile, feeling like a true American where my only form of ID is my driver's licence. (The authorities here don't really like that though. It's usually either a passport or the national ID card, and DL if and only if you're deadlocked and have no other photo ID.)

Silverfish. We've had issues with those creeping around at work, and I've had slight anxiety about bringing them home (they can be pesky to get rid of), but so far so good.

Until today, when there's a friggin' huge midnight assembly between those and some of our regular "pests", a never-ending army of pill-bugs (isopods) on an outside wall.

I think there's a chance the silverfish came with some gardening products we recently got, because I've never seen them around here before, and considering how the pill-bugs think they can come and go like they own the house (along with a bunch of spiders), it would be weird if the others had strictly kept to the outside until now if they weren't new in the area...

One scuttled inside when it got the chance, but I think I managed to bonk it with a shoe.

I knew someone who had these critters running around in their bathroom. That was NOT fun! Some of those were huge!

I survived but like only just. You know how some music genres/styles/whatever just grate on your nerves? That happened and I was so glad we had to leave early to get back home so I could make it to work without dying any more than usual. On the way home mum was like but you always listen to annyoing music Woman, we all have music we like and don't like and unfortunately the music mood they were in is the one that I'm never in. Mum is such a mum sometimes I swear, like they can have personal tastes but the rest of us can't or else we're just being contrary (that's kind of fun not gonna lie).

Ugh...our HVAC's AC unit died on us this afternoon and so my parents are sleeping downstairs whereas I sleep with the covers off.

Tomorrow morning, my parents and the cat will be in crumpled heaps from the humidity and heat.

As for myself, I at least had the foresight to prepare aguas frescas style drinks for the occasion and pass the time during the night writing musings about life and my love for it.

Problems with a new garden hose - seems to be something weird with the new connector, so it won't fasten properly to the hose. Had the equipment in the garage while the water was running, and suddenly the water stops in the water sprayer. Go out to check, and the garage is wet all over because the hose slipped out of the connector. Ended up getting sprayed a couple times while trying to fix it.

Good we had a spare connector that seemed to be of better quality, but still... That thing was new, directly from the shop.

(It's a short-time gardening project. New lawn - the old garden was so overgrown it looked like the house hadn't had people in it for the past 10-15 years... and truth be told, except for some mowing, the garden hasn't seen much care in that time )

Literally just being alive tbh. My BPD is just getting worse and worse. I’m starting to become even more paranoid of friends and family for no reason.

Got accepted into BSW and rounded off the year with a 4.0 GPA, but damn does it all ring hollow. Everyday I manage to outlive my expectations, so everything just feels foggy and surreal. I just want to lose myself in the lower pleasures because the higher pleasures are completely tenuous and dissatisfying, anyway.

Was driven to the psych office, only to be told that I was a week too early.

I will be calling in the morning.

Can I just say how much I HATE weeding the garden?
3 hours.
4+ buckets.
Energy blinking red, desperately needing recharging.
I'd rather be doing other things.
GAAH!

But hopefully that's it on that particular patch of garden for this summer, since we removed a lot of roots.

EDIT: Even more gardening (GAAAAAH!)
Found a ginormous plant root in the middle of the lawn (it was ruining the lawn). Took ages to dig up. That thing was probably the size of 3-4 tennis balls... plus picked a large bucket of dandelions and other weeds (with as many roots as possible - the less that comes up in the same place, the better).

^and that's why I'm conveniently elsewhere when mum or dad want the garden tidied

Went out on a walk with mum today on a route we haven't walked in a while cos other routes are more fun. Mum agreed to the plan so I was like nice we'll be home in 2 hours.
It was 5 hours for the almost the same distance. So inefficient it hurts.

Which has been my tactic all up until now (I've never liked any gardening).

Dad used to take care of the garden, but after their divorce the garden kind of just did its own thing. We've had some help with mowing the lawn, but that's about it (truth be told, I've never used a lawnmower...).

We're working on freshening up things (hiring workers to do the heavier bits), but some patches were a bit shabby after the workers had been around (they'd not done anything with some plants that grow quite large and have root systems quite far down - instead putting grass patches directly on top, which meant those couldn't root properly because they didn't get any contact with the soil. Some weeds were also mixed in with the new soil, so there were patches of mossy weed all over, with large root systems (tennisball-sized, at the very least). There were several very visible patches of weed underneath the lawn, too (that's likely going to be a problem). They'd also uprooted some rhubarb and accidentally "replanted" it in the middle of the lawn .

Or maybe just go for a walk on your own? I love solo walks!

My parents went through my Australian toothpaste collection and I feel violated. I'm 36 years old and evidently the only functioning adult in my household

I don't want them going into my room. That's my sanctuary. I don't go into the master suite until I am granted permission.

Forgot to post this, Saturday night:

Beyond disappointed by the outcome of the Eurovision song contest. Came home and had to make the bed because I had put the sheets to wash. As I'm tugging the sheet, I hear some commotion in the hallway. I come out and I see my cat tearing open two packs of kibble that I bought for the other cats at my parents' house. The cat got me infuriated, mostly because I keep serving him food – both dry and wet – and he always leaves some and it always goes to waste. What are you, hungry all of a sudden? It smell better if it's from a pack that's not yours? Grr.......

I clapped my hands so hard he flinched and ran to the living room, and quickly returned back to get some more food that's not his. I clapped my hands again and made threatening gestures (finger pointing at away-from-kibble). I put away what was left in those bags and closed the bedroom door shut. (He always sleeps with me in the bedroom overnight.)

He's usually vocal if he can't get in the bedroom or if any door in the apartment gets mysteriously closed for no reason, but he made no noise that night nor the morning after – he didn't even please meow back. I was still holding my grudge for like 15, 20 minutes until I woke up all the way and then we finally started snuggling again. Beef over... for now.

Also, food for thought for myself: am I a sore loser, or simply infuriated by the jury? Shouldn't there be a limit on how many 12 points can go to a given song? Even the Swiss contestant couldn't keep acting excited anymore after the 20th+ time someone gave them the 12 points... Not to mention how the jury voting becomes unwatchable because it heavily favors one particular jury-esque song instead of any of the people's favorites.

Feet aching after a LOT of walking this week.

And a F%#@$ brand new lawnmower that stopped working after only half the lawn! No idea what's wrong, but it's late so trying again tomorrow. Wasn't even me who was going to mow the lawn, but of course I got stuck with it

I am dealing with a rather annoying carpenter ant infestation and we are dealing with an aggressive colony this year.

Yesterday was... Ugh.

Work wasn't the worst, although if I never have to use a mop again I'll not complain (been washing more floors just this week than the entire run of my regular workplace). But the heat was absolutely extreme. Barely a hint of a breeze, felt like I was melting.

My legs are killing me. Been walking too much this week, and I've had too little rest between, so the pain just builds up. At the end of pretty much every day this week (in the worst shoes ever) my feet feel like I'm walking very slowly on burning coal.

And then there's the lawnmowing + the lawn. I already hate the thing. Got the lawnmower working again (It needed a cleaning... or a break. Maybe both). So now the lawn is mowed and there's the whole of the rest of the summer left (not looking forward to it).

Need I mention I was the one who had to do the mowing? After work (when I was already very tired)? Three rounds of it? With those feet? In the heat?

Yeah. Good thing I've got a long weekend...

Just when I thought I was ready to try the Life by You Early Access, the team postpones it due to programming\technical issues.

Argh! They promised to not push it further. But they did say they would keep their public posted.

At least I will be getting my hair dyed ruby red tomorrow. I am in desperate need of a shakeup in terms of my looks. My hair is growing out currently.

Realizing I am dealing with a house falling apart.

Although we painted a room, replaced a doorknob on the water closet, and got a new water heater...the sweat equity continues; However...our HVAC conked out, a dead, broken tree is laying on the front side of the house, and my plumbing in my bathroom went berserk that my father had to cut the water, so I can't bathe, use the toilet or brush my teeth in there.

For now, I need to find at least $6,000 to remove the tree just because it was deemed critical.

That lawnmower is starting to really piss me off... It's the 3rd (?) time it stops and doesn't want to start up again (takes a day or two before it does), and there's still a patch of grass left.

Probably too muddy/wet in that area. It's been a problem for a while (which we weren't quite aware of until it got really bad a couple days ago). We've watered the area because of the new lawn, but it's been a few days since the last time. The problem now is that the neighbor has left a hose on to water a tree for several hours a day, which makes the ground even worse. Today wasn't as bad as a couple days ago, but still... The area needs to dry up a bit more (and it doesn't help that it's going to rain next week...)

And despite removing bucketloads of weeds not too long ago, there were another two bucketloads in the same area today.

Also, my laptop crashed randomly a few days ago, and it's been slow and weird ever since (everything Windows-related opens up and closes down again almost immediately, and is generally much slower than usual). Been trying to figure out what the problem is, and running the problemsolving tools and all that - likely some corrupted files somewhere. Usually things like this tend to fix itself after a few restarts and with the integrated autofixing tools, but this time it seems the problem is a bit worse. Gah, I hate this!

A transphobic coworker singling out a trans coworker. Who gets called into HR? The target. WTF! It's wrong in so many ways.

The month of May has been such a pain in the ass. I'm glad it's almost over. Long-winded post ahead.

One of my guinea pigs has been having teeth issues. He lost is top incisors somehow which lead to a emergency trip to the vet last month as his lower incisors grew too long which I didn't know about. His teeth were trimmed, then they were trimmed again 2 weeks ago. Tomorrow he has to go in for a x-ray as my vet suspects his teeth issues are genetic. They have to do the x-ray under anesthesia as my vet literally has to get into his mouth to do said x-ray and there is no way he'll sit still / tolerate it while being awake. His top incisors have yet to come back. Doing a x-ray from top down won't show what is going on with his tooth development at the root. If tomorrows vet visit shows weird things, I'll have to go through this again with my other guinea pig. He has all of his teeth, but if this problem is genetic, then the odds are high that he'll eventually have the same problem.

Note: Guinea pigs, chinchillas, rabbits, pocket pets such as hamsters, ect... all need hard things to chew on to keep their teeth trim so they don't become overgrown. Sterling ( my chinchilla) will buzz through things to chew like a angry beaver, the guinea pigs, not so much. Both of them have things to chew on, they ignore them. I have yet to figure out how to make a guinea pig chew things for their own good. I can't bribe them with anything sweet as it causes other forms of dental disease and sugar messes with the flora in their gut which causes a whole host of other health problems.

Then there is the credit card issues which have nothing to do with guinea pigs or vets.

Somebody decided to do online shopping on my dime. Before that happened, I tried to order something online.

The store where the fraud happened decided to wait a week before getting back to me. I gave them 24 hours, the store couldn't be bothered to tell me anything, so I contacted my bank. Then there was the thing I tried to order online. I called the company looking for when my order was going to be shipped. I was told they had no such order and the charge to my account was 'fake' and they would get "back to me." Yeah, no. Contacted my bank again. Online company got back to me 24 hours later saying they were looking into things but by that time my bank was investigating what was going on.

It goes without saying, while all of this is going on, my credit account is shut down to prevent any further 'damage'. Bank starts the process of sending a new card, blah, blah, blah. I eventually get my money back for both charges and have a new card with a new number. All is good, then yesterday happened.

I bought something via Ko-Fi. The first thing went through with no problem. Then I found a Reshade preset I liked, so I tried to 'donate' the dollar ( plus VAT because the person was from the UK) to get the preset. The first time I tried, I got a error that my card was declined. So I tried again, declined. Knowing that Ko-Fi doesn't like my browser settings sometimes, I tried one more time with another browser and got a message that my card wouldn't accepted for such a purchase. At that point I gave up and went about my day.

This morning I find my card has been shut down. There was no fraud. The first purchase was legit as were my other 3 attempts for another person. None of the other 3 charges will go through as my card was declined for whatever reason. There is no balance / money owed on said card.

This isn't the first time I've bought something that involved a VAT, hence my confusion. I have a program called Revo Uninstaller. I have the free version on one system and the pro ( paid for version) on this one. I believe that company is out of Germany.

I have to go to the bank today anyway, but now there is another reason tossed onto the pile. It is going to be a long day...

I haven't really been around much lately because I found out I have cancer, and have promptly started cancer treatment on the 23rd (day after my 29th birthday). It's been shit. Everyone's feeling the pressure, me and my husband argue a lot, which in turn is having a negative effect on the kids. So instead of arguing, I've been biting myself on the arm, which is giving me massive bruises which makes my husband uncomfortable because "it looks like I've been grabbing you" so I'm suppose to stop doing that too. So I have 0 coping mechanisms. Life is bland. I'm tired all the time. I have been slowly crocheting a ninja turtle hat but honestly I have 0 motivation. I've been reading To Kill a Mockingbird but it's taken me nearly a month to read 60 pages. I just don't care anymore. Nothing seems to matter anymore. I'm so stressed trying to have good memories, not that it matters because I am almost definitely going to be completely fine because of my age and that it was caught early and blahblahblah. It all just sucks right now though. Sad. Because we had started to build up funds again to work on the house, and Husband was getting his licence back next month so we can spend more time together and have a nice summer. And I just don't even care anymore about any of it.

@Bigsimsfan12 I'm so sorry to hear this, I hope you start to feel better very soon. Take one day at a time, sending you hugs.

Blargh! Due to failure to meet expectations by the crew, Live by You has been cancelled.

I signed up for Early Access and watched all those YouTube videos!

Well, back to The Sims 3 for me...

I was expecting this, it's a real shame but after the last early access cancellation, the team went quiet and it became apparent that the situation was serious.

Oh, the news about Life By You got worse. The studio in California shuttered barely 24 hours after the cancellation announcement, so it's down to two games competing against The Sims series.

Yes, the situation went from bad to worse.

That and the pollen in my region is so bad, I am coughing, belching gas, sneezing, feeling choked.

%&#$@% work app. I have no idea how to get that thing to work properly. It either throws me out when I try to log in (not the proper credentials, or some BS), it's the wrong section of the app/site when I try it on the computer, or it probably is the wrong app altogether (but it doesn't seem like it is, because it is connected to the work mail).

I hate apps with a passion... Most of them, anyway... Especially work-related ones

I fell asleep and missed my teleconference and I now have to wait until July 17th or, barring that, an earlier appointment.

I also ended up having to buy digitally distributed software twice because the interface wouldn't allow for me to put the product key in...Good thing I had some money on hand.

Long story short, I thought my phone would make life easier.

Note to self: Desktop programs must be purchased at the desktop.

But I am dealing with a stand off between the harvestmen and myself (I hate dealing with bugs. How they creep me the math out!)

I'll try to keep this short and simple.

I got evicted, supposedly the whole household but they had been targeting me for years now. So I was woke up by the constable, allowed to grabbed some basic things and told to leave and never come back. Great, during the heat wave too. No family, no friends, no one to trust, no one to help. Well, I do have family and those I trust but they are on the other side. Oh joy, how I wish I was there too but no, I'm still stuck here on this side with a a bunch of creepers constantly stalking me, taking pictures of me, recording me, watching my every move. And no it's not paranoia; there's a whole network of these sickos.

All I wanted in life was simple: To love and be loved.

I don't care about wealth, I don't care about material possessions, I don't care about social status or any other useless worldly thing. Sure those things would be nice and I would appreciate it, but that's not what's important to me.

So the first night I get a cheap motel room because I need to get out of the heat and I had been walking most of the day and was drenched in sweat. Unfortunately, usually cheap motels/hotels means low star ratings for such things like roaches and dirty beds. I never slept, I never sat on the bed; I was exhausted and stayed up the entire night. Then my journey took me to some expensive hotel room, it was nice but the staff there were the type of people who pretend to be friendly for the sake of their job performance. Or in other words, I'm self-diagnosed autistic and being overstimulated can often put my brain in a 'still processing' mode or 'I cannot retain all the information you said'.

It's funny how time went by so quick and I decided not to stay at that hotel.

Then my journey took me to another hotel which is the one I'm currently still at. I like the location, the staff, it's mostly clean, I love the modern bathrooms and best of all compared to the other rooms, this hotel has hand soap, body wash, shampoo, conditioner and lotion. And this hotel with the rewards program, even without, is way cheaper than that overpriced hotel room.

So yeah, I'm homeless. My family not only abandoned me but they also betrayed me and yet they still target me. I suspect my brother is not only into cp but also into incest and may be the one behind all these strange men. Though it's not always just men, sometimes they can be couples, sometimes a lone woman. Evil can look like anyone.

Oh you're just like your mother, someone says and your brother is just like your dad. Yeah, I get the reference. Two of light and two of dark. But ever since my mother passed away now it's uneven.

Anyway, without a residence and without a job, this won't last for long. So then where will my journey take me then?

Also, why oh why is it so difficult for me to find a job in the first place? It's like the moment I show up to an interview, I immediately get judged and either ignored or silently yeah she won't be working here. Because I pick up on so much subtle and not so subtle cues like body language, facial expressions, etc. It's not surprising though, I've been an outcast this far into my life.

Despite everything and not knowing what will happen next, I'm still joyful and happy.

Oh and have you heard or read of stories about young children going up to strangers like they sense that stranger is going through a tough time or something. Well, I'm not sure exactly what it meant, but a young toddler came up to me in the mall and he just looked up at me with his binky still in his mouth and held his gaze for awhile. I couldn't help but smile, I did feel seen and acknowledged when the whole world moves on and I feel so...invisible.

Whatever anyone is going through, please keep moving forward. Don't give up, no matter what. The night won't last forever; it might be one very long night, but it won't last forever.

Oh dear @Deshong I am sorry to hear you are having such trouble, do you have enough internet access? Maybe it would be possible to find a charity or shelter where you could stay for a while. I'm not sure where you are, but in the country where I am there is quite a good support and advice for homeless. I hope you can get something sorted out and stay safe!

@Deshong Stay safe! Check with your local municipality, they could have support that you can access through them only and hopefuly they'll sort things out soon.

Turned out our favorite brand of spice blends "King of the Cajun" closed down last year and the blend we buy (Cream Sauce) for our dish of Deconstructed Primavera is no more.

Sad, because it's been a family dish we enjoyed and the spice blend tied it together. It was a small business and you could only buy it online at their shop if you couldn't get to their shop.

At the very least, libraries tend to be good places for information and/or a place to get out of the heat or cold for the homeless. At least until opening and closing hours. I live in the U.S.A. and there are way more homeless with the population growing; moreso than there are shelters and/or help available. Generally speaking, people look down on the homeless with no compassion or understanding. Some people blame everything on drugs and alcohol even though there are a lot of homeless who are not abusers of such. There are many ways anyone can just find themselves being homeless.

There's so many solutions, yet the government does not care or this wouldn't be an issue, at least not for the ones who want to integrate back into working society. Even so those who choose to be homeless because they see the corruption in life and refuse to return; I don't blame them. When you're on the outside looking in, you see the world for what it really is and it's ugly. For those who don't conform to the world's standard are ostracized, bullied, patronized and dehumanized.

But okay, enough of that before I start writing a whole essay.



Unfortunately, in some cases, homeless shelters tend to be full and there's no telling how long being put on a waiting list is going to last for. I tried, then I saw one of many stalkers parked out front, and I didn't get a good vibe and didn't feel safe so just ended up refusing being put on a waiting list. Too many other red flags as well and I'm going to stick with listening to my intuition.

=======

Finances, politics, religion, home maintenance, pest control, postal deliveries and cooking...I can't believe I have to be the only functioning adult in the house again...educating myself on these things

Somebody, anybody, please come along and put me out of this misery by lightening the load...I don't want to die, but I would love help...

^
The above statement has been a repeat of what happened in winter...

I rather be on a beach with a family of my own and just relaxing in the fresh air, but some beaches are closed in my region.

Either way...the seagulls dumped on me. So did those pigeons and the crows!

I know it is only the first week of July, but can tourist season be declared as over yet? It has been a week of listening to people fighting, clogging up parking lots by means of parking sideways, people sticking their asses out as far as their spine will allow them in the aisles of the grocery store, ect... None of this is cute or entertaining. It has been a week of unwarranted lunacy.

I hate the fact that "If the Great Outdoors are so great, why do the bugs come in?" Is the current pest situation! The biggest annoyances are flies buzzing about.

^ Flies, spiders, flying ants, isopods, moths... even found a caterpillar in the shower not long ago (while I was taking a shower - ick!).

The isopods have calmed down a bit, though. They used to invade the house, and we could find 4-5 every day. But now - either it's the season, or they've finally settled down in the garden where they belong, after we fixed the grass. I see them scuttling around down there when I'm weeding the garden, but they seem happy enough to be where they belong, now. Actually, there seem to be a touch fewer creeping bugs overall. Except the spiders - they pop up randomly as always.

Now they just attack me full-force when I'm mowing the lawn (moths, tiny butterflies, tiny flies, tiny spiders in the trees/bushes, gnats if it's late, the occasional wasp)...

Speaking of mowing the lawn, that entire project has more or less ruined my entire summer. Did not expect me having to do most of the work with that one... Or that the lawnmower would be the moodiest freak of a machine there ever was on the planet. That thing needs the lawn to stay dry (and preferably warm-ish) for 3-4 days to manage it all, and does it stay dry and warm-ish for 3-4 days any time this summer? Nope. Rain pretty much every other day all of June and July

The septic tank is breaking and needs pumping! Just after my toilet was fixed for extra running water running.

My dad got in touch with his dad. But for tonight, unless we poop...or need to drain things, we can't use the plumbing.

The roof still needs work. What a shit show this summer is turning out to be.